I need to start writing again. Last week kinda kicked my ass, emotionally and mentally, so here is a small thought to get me back into the flow of things.
I kinda obsessively read about gender and equality issues. It both infuriates and fascinates me, a political/cultural train wreck that I can’t look away from. In my information absorption I’ve noticed an interesting pattern, and it is based on how people feel about how gender affects them. It is mostly the dichotomy between men who “argue” (which is to say, they actual think or feel) that there are differences between genders (or sex, or whatever they use to describe a binary system), so everything derives from that, and women who argue that they are discriminated against in nearly all aspects of life because of role assignment.
It is easy for me to value one of those points of view over the other; when people defend the status quo, I just can’t imagine why they put forth that effort. In fact, when I hear someone being defensive of how things are, I tend to look for ways I can personally change my little piece of the world so that the status quo doesn’t have as much sway.
So, when you find yourself being nominally a member of the group that is the oppressor, I would appreciate if you keep your feelings of pseudo-science and hear-say to yourself. Just, you know, love yourself. Realize that you aren’t responsible for the wars of past generations. You didn’t bring slaves over, or kill native folks. None of us did that. It is merely our responsibility to always become better than those generations, and ensure that those things never happen again.
To those who find yourself challenging the status quo, because it leaves you out, you have an ally in me. Let’s talk! I want to know more about your passion and struggles.
And now for something completely tangential
It disturbs me that if my child decides to be anything they want (which is what I hope for Clover), they could be harassed (and I have a very encompassing definition of harassment). I am becoming a parent, of course, but it is a net positive; I am feeling old before my direct descendant is even using their lungs for breathing, but I can channel my protective urges into effort to create an environment and tribe that will promote Clover in the way that all humans deserve.
I will try my best to ensure that Clover doesn’t enact aggression against others, and will respect others’ autonomy, and will always defer to actions that rely on, and encourage, the consent of all involved. In return, I expect all you other humans to do that same.
There may not be a biological or cultural reason to live like that. But it isn’t prohibited, either. Awesome.
Well, that went on for a bit longer than I planned…