here i will log food that i rendered inedible. i can’t even call it cooking because all i’m doing is using electric appliances.
exhibit A: frozen bagels. beauty’s gave away a bunch of day-olds.
first, i tried leaving it in the microwave for 10 minutes. i bricked my bagel. i knocked it against the plate and di said “you’re gonna break the plate!”
second, i looked online and wikihow said to wrap the bagel in a wet paper towel and microwave for 10 seconds before cutting and sticking in the toaster on the lowest setting. i’m reusing a little hand towel that i wash out each time. it came out great.
my third bagel went swimmingly until toast phase. it got jammed. it tried to spring itself, but turns out entrapment leads to the heating element just staying on forever.
here’s a pop tart that fell apart. i take it as an omen. i will keep the shard to fight off white walkers. and california is going to fall off into the ocean.